Blonde Ambitions Part III (The "Older does not mean old" Pt.2)

Note: I started this series a gazillion years ago and today I felt like continuing. If everything goes as planned, I'll finish it by March, 2065.

Toni Collette wasTara in United States of Tara.

I ended up the last Blonde Ambitions post with a cheat. Rosemarie DeWitt is not a blonde. Well, but her sister Tara is. Tara was played by the wonderful Toni Collette with ease and especially with sense of humor. The show walked that blurry line that dramedy is. It had laugh-out-loud moments but the aftertaste used to be bitter. Thankfully, Collette's performance was always humanly light; even when some of the storylines were just hard to believe, she made them perfectly plausible. And her performance of all the alters is priceless... In regards to her career, well she's been nominated for an Oscar for her work in The Sixth Sense. She should have at the very least another nod for Muriel's Wedding and possibly a third one for Little Miss Sunshine.

Best Moments: My favorite alters were Alice, Gimme and Chicken

Leslie Grossman was Mary Cherry in Popular

It's Mary Cherry, y'all!! Actually it's Leslie Grossman but she will always be Mary Cherry in my heart. She does not have a very enviable career but only playing the Southern Belle Mary Cherry in Popular is enough for me. She was the highlight of an awesome show... Also, she was in Grey's Anatomy as a lovely hypochondriac who had to have her husband's poop up her nose... Everyone with a brain knows that Ryan Murphy should give her an epic role in Glee. Even better if she gets to play Mary Cherry all grown up!

Best Moments: Mascara-eyes when imagining winning Prom Queen, the episode she goes poor, finding her long-lost twin sister... Oh! And they call her QUACK!!

Elizabeth Mitchell was Juliet in Lost

When you're alone and life is making you lonely you can always go... Downtowon. From the moment the song started playing and Juliet burnt her muffins I was completely in love with her. And I didn't even know what the hell was she doing on the show. A bad guy turned good guy, Juliet and her untimely death (she was so brave!!) will live forever in the brains of us, pop culture junkies. She was in the V remake but I never saw it...

Best Moments: The relationship with Jack through the glass. I was never really into her coupling with Sawyer...

Lisa Kudrow was Phoebe in Friends

Phoebe Buffay is the kind of friend anyone would want. She is funny, caring, generous and makes wonderful 3D art. It is almost impossible to choose a favorite Friend but Phoebe would fight for the top spot. Lisa Kudrow is one half of Romy and Michele (which I haven't seen yet!!) and was the worst part of Easy A but still, thanks for Phoebe.

Best Moments: Gauze, we need more gauze!!

Sarah Jessica Parker was Carrie in Sex and the City

What can I say about Carrie? I love her so much that I convinced myself for a long time that Sex and the City: the Movie deserved a spot on the top Five of films of 2008. That's right. If I had voted for the Oscars I would have voted for that film. Having rewatched it recently, I can say that I was blinded. By the wonderful wardrobe and the silly puns. And being almost a full-fledged adult, I can say: NEVER follow romantic advice from this show. That is not how healthy adults should behave (well, probably Samantha was the only one honest in her relationships...) Sarah Jessica Parker was also wonderful in Ed Wood and Hocus Pocus and she was so funny in The First Wives Club (and she probably was the one to suggest Morty the earring and thus provided the world with the wonderful line: "Morty, Morty, what are you? A pirate?")

Best Moments: Carrie: I was just reading.

                        Enid: Hello.

                        Carrie: Hi.

Also the ending of season 2, wishfully thinking that it was Big who couldn't tame her, walking wearing the Galliano newspaper dress after talking to Natasha and the way she tosses the plant that Aidan had brought into the trash and walks away in that wonderful skirt. (It was all about the clothes!!)

Thea Gill was Lindsay in Queer as Folk

Lindsay in Queer as Folk was half of the super couple that everyone rooted for. The fate of Justin and Brian was always obscure but Lindsay and Melanie HAD to be together. She was the best friend, wife and mother (with the permission of Debbie) you could find in Pittsburgh. Extra Points: Thea Gill played Diana Childs in the ridiculously awesome show Dante's Cove and her portrayal of the deranged witch was just nuts!

Best Moments: I loved Lindsay when she was good (most of the time) but I adored her when she was bad. It showed that she was human.Highlights were her sleeping with the famous painter and telling her friends' secrets to a lawyer for some selfish purpose I've forgotten.

Blonde Ambitions Part III (The "Older does not mean old" Pt.1)

Blonde TV actresses that have grown up can also be ambitious. Some of them have fared better than others through those ambitions nevertheless...

Elizabeth Perkins as Celia Hodes in Weeds

Celia is that neighbour we all want to have, don't we? If she is portrayed by Elizabeth Perkins I definitely want her close. She is so fun in the role (or was, I should say...) that even though in real life she would be annoying it is impossible not to love her on the show. Reading Elizabeth's Imdb page I only remember her in The Ring 2. (WARNING: Embarrasing story follows) I went to see The Ring 2 to the theatre (I had already seen the first one and I liked it) and in a magazine I had read that Sissy Spacek appeared in the film. It was curious because of her portrayal of Carrie in the homonymous film. Well, back then, I had not seen Carrie, and so I thought she was the actress playing the doctor in that scary needle scene (or was it a scary pair of scissors? Scary either way...). Yes, I thought Elizabeth Perkins was Sissy Spacek. And they do not look much alike actually...

Felicity Huffman (Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives)

Felicity Huffman is the only woman on this post to have been nominated for a Best Actress Oscar. Even so, she is not the most succesful of the lot by far. Right now, she seems condemned to play Lynette Scavo forever. Not that she's not good at it but her storylines are lately the most boring ones. Plus, Tom Scavo is possibly the most annoying character ever to appear on television. Nevertheless she will always be able to say that she worked with Paul Thomas Anderson... 

Julie Bowen as Claire Dunphy in Modern Family

And we encounter the third housewife in a row, the one without a known job, the magnificent Claire Dunphy. To be honest I'm more on Team Gloria but since she is not a blonde... Not to worry because my love for Claire is also great. Julie Bowen entered my life as Jack's I-want-to-dance-at-my-wedding-wife in Lost. Then she was the MILF on Weeds that allowed us to see Silas' on action (the gif is very small but if you saw the scene, you will remember it). For her future, she is set to appear on Horrible Bosses playing Kevin Spacey's wife if I recall correctly. Playing the wife of Kevin Spacey in a Jennifer Anniston /Jason Bateman (The Switch was quite endearing) comedy might not seem much but less is nothing...

Kelly Rutherford (Lily Van Der Woodsen Bass Humphrey... in Gossip Girl)

Lily could also be considered a housewife, only her chores consist on sitting at a table writing thank-you notes rather than kneeling to scrub the floors... I love Lily even when she is mean or has ulterior motives (once every two episodes) because Kelly's portrayal makes her so endearing... even when she's next to hateful-Rufus! Anyway Kelly has done a lot of films, a lot of TV and though her future seems to be solely occupied by Gossip Girl she will always be able to say that she was killed in a Scream film...Isn't that what every actress want?

Rosemarie DeWitt is Charmaine in "United States of Tara"

THE CHEAT FACTOR: Yes, I know she is not a blonde but it's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Besides, Rosemarie's talent is too big to be overlooked. I think that picture is from Rachel Getting Married where she also played a woman outshined by her sister craziness. She brings so much life and wit into Charmaine that it is impossible not to love the self-absorbed bitch she is. As to her ambitions, she had a great role on Mad Men and was very well received though not near as much (in quantity) as she deserved for her Rachel. She plays Ben Affleck's wife or girlfriend or something (they are in bed in the trailer) in The Company Men. And I fondly remember her as Miranda's mean co-worker in a Sex and the City episode...

To be continued...

Blonde Ambitions Part II (The Abortions)

Please, understand that the title of this post has nothing to do with Vera Drake's profession. What has been aborted were the careers of these TV blondes. Another thing these two girls have in common is their show ending this 2010. And so did their hopes to work...

Becki Newton was Amanda on Ugly Betty and she was hilarious. From killing one-liners ("I have pornographic memory") to physical comedy (her way of walking should have earned top billing) she was the funniest part about a show that, let's face it, was not very good. But alas, I loved it. And Amanda was (obviously) my favorite character. And poor Becki Newton got a leading role in a sitcom about a virgin (whom she was going to play) and she got pregnant. Maybe she thought the role was for an HBO epic in which she would play the Virgin Mary. Whatever her reasoning, the thing is that, in that particular case, a pregnant virgin was not what was required. So she was out of job (but with a baby, so she was happy nevertheless). We can only hope that once those stretch marks have faded she will make us laugh again.

Emilie de Ravin, on the other hand, was never much fun on her show (Lost, for the two people who did not follow it). She was cute, sweet and on one flashback, a brunette. But she was never fun per se. Maybe with the fake peanut butter... Anyway, she was blonde and beautiful and it looked like she was going to have a career in movies. She appeared on Michael Mann's Public Enemies (a film which also featured current go-to girl Carey Mulligan but they could be pointing a gun to my head and I still would not remember her) and on that hey-it's-Robert-Pattinson film Remember me and then she fell off the side of the Earth! Ironic after starring in a film which title is imploring us not to forget her...

Conclusion: These two girls were promised a paradise that was lost. Time will tell if they can regain it... (How awful it is to make a Milton reference when all you have read of his work are the titles?)

To be continued...

Blonde Ambitions Part I (The Antichrist)

If you were expecting some kind of cool Antichrist (like Charlotte Gainsbourg with a talking fox) this is not your lucky day. This is just your regular Katherine Heigl Antichrist. Inspired by Human Dramedy's wonderful take on a couple of brunettes, I thought I would do the same for the blondes of the world, the TV world that is. Blonde actresses working (now or sometime) on television and how have they fared in their careers. And as I compiled the list of the actresses I would like to discuss, I realized that a post was not enough to accomplish such a task. So here it is the first part of this humble project. (sidenote: there is nothing more humble than calling yourself humble) And as I do in life, I have chosen to start with the more disgusting part: the black-void blonde ambition.

Katherine Heigl first appeared in my life as Izzie Stevens on Grey's Anatomy and I'm proud to say I loved her! Her character was nothing if not lovable and someone playing a doctor so nice has to be nice in real life... Ha! The magic of television is prone to fool you. After becoming one of the most loathed characters ever she eventually left the show that gave her everything and turned into a "movie star". I could be Ok with that. Celebrities are entitled to bitchiness according to Bette Davis' and Joan Crawford's gospels... But if you leave a decent (or semi-decent by the time she left) show to star in films such as 27 dresses, The Ugly Truth or Killers, be prepared to be hated by me. And to be fair, I have not seen any of those films but this is my blog and I can have prejudices if I want to!! If you don't like it, stop reading and go watch High School Musical for all I care!! Blah! Crazy!!

Anyway, Katherine Heigl, I hate you. I loved you once, though. But don't worry, it doesn't look like my love for you is ever coming back... So this is it. The first Blonde Ambition and she's burnt in hatred flames!

To be continued...