When Awards Get Predictable...

 ...dresses are always there! Sidenote: I am so not complaining about the awards because for the most part (Glee over Modern Family, seriously?) they were very much fair and awesome. And now let's talk dresses... Best ones, specifically.

HONORABLE MENTIONS (Eco-friendly: Think Green)

Mila Kunis (Honorable Mention)

Elisabeth Moss (Honorable Mention)

Both Honorable Mentions wore green and both were winners (spiritually, at least). I still haven't seen Black Swan (even though earlier today I cried hearing an interview with Aronofsky) so I can't say about Mila but Elisabeth was robbed. Her work in Mad Men's fourth season has been her best so far. And her previous work was already perfect! I'm a little glad for Katey Sagal but only because Ed O'Neill was happy for her...

#10. Julianne Moore

10. Julianne Moore in Lanvin.

Julianne Moore was so cool in this hot pink. And she was so happy when Annette won... Those two should be lesbians in real life and adopt another couple of should-be lesbians (Amanda Seyfried and Ellen Page) [Theory adapted from Deivith's twisted mind]

#9 Angelina Jolie

9. Angelina Jolie.

No offense to Mila and Elisabeth but this is wearing green. She was so beautiful and so Goddess-like. I love how she spent the gala cuddling with Brad and applying lip-gloss. It's like she has taken a page from the Kate Winslet book and she wants to convince us that she is NORMAL and that she has done her own make-up.

#8 Sofía Vergara

8. Sofia Vergara.

SHE WAS ROBBED. She was. God knows I love Lynch's work but Gloria is beyond goodness. And on top of it she makes it look effortless. The episode where she learnt to bike was pure gold "What if someone tries to grab me?". O woe, I hope she gets the Emmy in August... Anyway, the dress fitted her like a glove in all her "volumptuosity" and the color was so bold and flattering...

#6 & #7 Heather Morris and Naya Rivera

Heather Morris

Naya Rivera

Not only were they incredibly beautiful but also matched each other! If in one season on Glee they have gone from backup dancers to fan-favorites these two girls will win Oscars in about five years. That, or worldwide domination... And they are so slender...

#5 Olivia Wilde

5. Olivia Wilde in Marchesa.

I don't like Olivia Wilde much (even though she was very nice in Tron and she played a lesbian in O.C. [I've just realized that excepting Sofía every woman up to now has played a lesbian or a bisexual; am I sensing a theme?]) but this dress definitely makes my esteem for her grow. I love it when not-so-famous people really commit to a dress. It's like they're saying: "I might be a boring character in boring House but look at my dress, I could be a star" and I like that, yes, I do...

#4 Scarlett Johansson

4. Scarlett Johansson.

I really don't like Scarlett Johansson but when she appeared on the red carpet last night both my boyfriend and I went "OHMYGODSHELOOKSSOGOOD!!" And she did. She has lost some weight and it is good because now her boobs are smaller than her head, something quite tasteful if you like to display them like on a window-shop (only exception to the rule: Christina Hendricks, of course). It may be related to the divorce but if it was Ryan who left her he must be regretting it now (specially if the rumors are true and he is in fact doing the nasty with Sandra Bullock who since yesterday is to be known as Latoya Jackson's lost twin). And the hair... So dramatic. I love it!

Scarlett's amazing hair

#3 Emma Stone

3. Emma Stone in Calvin Klein.

Blonde hair looks so good on her (don't misinterpret me, she is freakingly beautiful as a redhead), it makes her look older and more sophisticated... And that dress. So simple and yet so effective. It looks seamless like the dress Lisa Marie Presley wears in Mars Attacks! This girl (Emma, not Lisa Marie) sure does know how to become a star. Question: Wouldn't it be great if she got the fifth spot in the Oscars? Answer: Yes, it would be!

#2 Anne Hathaway

2. Anne Hathaway in Armani Privé.

It would also be extremely cool that the fifth spot went to Anne. Ok, the film is not very good but she is so devilishly charming. She is the new Amy Adams only with extra charisma. And I don't think she has ever been as chic and beautiful as she was last night. This 70s vibe totally suits her, in my opinion better than the princess thing though she is lovely as well in that mode (remember the Oscars '08: "Frank Langella was sitting right next to me"). I can't wait to see her host the Oscars. And I've just read that she's going to be in Glee. Which is awesome because she sings soooo well and that's why she should sing at the Oscars because she does it well... Duh!

#1 January Jones

1. January Jones in Versace.

January Jones won't go for second best, baby. She won't settle with being the most mesmerizingly beautiful woman (make that human being [make that being in general]) on the Universe and in every possible alternate universe. No. She has to be a killer dresser as well. Not to mention the creator of one of the most complex and accomplished characters ever in the history of the audiovisual. But going back to the clothes... She is such an amazing dresser, always thinking outside the box. I remember being completely obsessed with her outfit at the Met Gala (the Superheroes one)... And this red Versace (she is the new face) is perfection. It is so risky and yet she wears it with more ease than what I can have when wearing my pajamas. It's like she was born to wear this dress, and let's face it, the dress is amazingly beautiful in all its detail but without January's attitude it would not be the same. And what about her face? I could be looking at it forever... It is art!

Isn't she gorgeous?